As always when I am running behind for some plan I've made, I think I'll sit down and write a blog. Procrastination is a unique hobby of mine. Lets start with the most excellent news my lovely yahoo.com homepage just gave me. Ding dong the witch is dead =) bye bye lipstick republicans.
But away from politics for a bit. Work has, of course, been insane. I didn't get a day off this week and I had to go in early twice. Oh the benefits of living with your office manager.I took Nori in for shots and things this week and she is a very healthy kitty which means I get to keep her. =) My parents have been at each others throats, but dad is about to head to Texas for a few weeks so peace is on its way.
Somehow I thought I had more to say when I started this entry...hm. I had lunch with K and S a few days ago and we discussed my relationship/relationshit (as I sometimes lovingly refer to it.) I am no closer to making a decision than I was pre-peptalk though. I think I am a coward. Or maybe we just aren't destined to break up. I'm heading to his house in a bit for some 4th fun. This may be the most bland and boring blog I have ever written. Sadface. Oh well. Too bad I don't support the use of backspace when blogging.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
All work and no play
Okay. Apparently Cat and blogs do not mix well together. I stay too busy to give regular insightful blogs. So far this week, I have worked 22 hours. IN TWO DAYS. That's a little excessive. I mean really. I used to go from school essentially for socialization reasons only from 10:05-3:20, drive 30 minutes to work and then work from 4:00-6:30ish. Monday i worked nonstop from 7:00am to 7:15pm. I thought I was going to die. Clearly my inability to work for extended periods is why I'm going to be a teacher. (and don't forget summer vacation!) But anyway, I've gotten in the habit of just thinking through everyday and all of my emotions every night before I go to bed, so writing a blog seems superfluous at times, especially when I am about to fall asleep standing up. I really enjoy writing blogs though, so here is an update on the world as Cat knows it.
A) I got a cat!!!!! Well, she is still and outside cat like Billy-Oscar-Clovis but she is not a barn cat; she is a front porch cat. She just showed up out of the blue on Saturday. She is really really affectionate and she greets me every time I go outside which is a foolproof way to make my day better. Her name is Nori. More updates on my exciting new kitty are sure to follow.
B) I broke down and spent some of the ridiculous amounts of grad money I have received (ok, a side note here: I can't spell any word that contains an "i" and an "e". Yay spellcheck? I also can't spell Wednesday but that's another matter entirely.) on a Zune pass. That wonderful little piece of electronic plastic means I can download an unlimited amount of music. Yes.....unlimited. So far, I have increased my library by 2,200 songs, and those are just songs I pick on a whim, not a systematic renovation of musical possibilities. It's a little terrifying. If you the reader of my pathetic attempt at an introspective blog, have songs or artists to suggest, feel free. I am a big fan of music.
C)My parents do on again off again better than any other couple I have witnessed in my life. If they had Twitter, I am afraid the mood swings would be enough to cause the Internet to come crumbling down. I am considering moving out. At the moment the only semi-logical place I have to move to is J's house and that is a little complicated. But it is nonetheless a possibility.
D)I graduated? I suppose I really haven't blogged since then. Same old same old: No new sense of accomplish, A little more personal emphasis on maturity, A little less patience with a boyfriend who works 4 hours a day and play video games for 12.
E) I think I have convinced my gparents that they desperately want to leave their cozy seaside villa the first week of August and allow me and my closest friends to raid and pillage the place. For honesty's sake I suppose I should say the seaside villa is actually a cozy little double wide about a block and a half from the beach. But that is a technicality. Since all it would cost is gas money and groceries, I believe firmly in not looking a gift horse in the mouth. Once they give me a final ok I will make more official plans, but right now I think it would be an excellent last party for J, F, J, K and myself. Who knows what the final guest list will look like though.
F) I started senior year with a promise that I would not give anyone a reason to say I was the reason their relationship ended, and although I succeeded I still feel like I broke that promise. I wanted J to leave K and I wanted to be a part in J's life. Congratulations, that sounds like a distinct hope to be a home wrecker. I am a truly bad person. But although in these past blog free weeks I have thought about J a lot, I think I've finally had a breakthrough. I don't want to get involved in something that is not my business. I miss J like crazy but as long as he is with K and I am with J I am going to do my very damn best not to think of him as anything other than a friend. I am going to figure out a way to not flirt with him constantly. At the moment he is making that very easy. I haven't seen him since graduation. I had one 2 minute phone call with him about hanging out, but he couldn't so that is the end of that story. If 6 months from now J and I are both single, it might be a different story. But I am going to try as hard as possible to make my current relationship work. Right now that means getting off the computer and getting ready for his house. Peace out-C
A) I got a cat!!!!! Well, she is still and outside cat like Billy-Oscar-Clovis but she is not a barn cat; she is a front porch cat. She just showed up out of the blue on Saturday. She is really really affectionate and she greets me every time I go outside which is a foolproof way to make my day better. Her name is Nori. More updates on my exciting new kitty are sure to follow.
B) I broke down and spent some of the ridiculous amounts of grad money I have received (ok, a side note here: I can't spell any word that contains an "i" and an "e". Yay spellcheck? I also can't spell Wednesday but that's another matter entirely.) on a Zune pass. That wonderful little piece of electronic plastic means I can download an unlimited amount of music. Yes.....unlimited. So far, I have increased my library by 2,200 songs, and those are just songs I pick on a whim, not a systematic renovation of musical possibilities. It's a little terrifying. If you the reader of my pathetic attempt at an introspective blog, have songs or artists to suggest, feel free. I am a big fan of music.
C)My parents do on again off again better than any other couple I have witnessed in my life. If they had Twitter, I am afraid the mood swings would be enough to cause the Internet to come crumbling down. I am considering moving out. At the moment the only semi-logical place I have to move to is J's house and that is a little complicated. But it is nonetheless a possibility.
D)I graduated? I suppose I really haven't blogged since then. Same old same old: No new sense of accomplish, A little more personal emphasis on maturity, A little less patience with a boyfriend who works 4 hours a day and play video games for 12.
E) I think I have convinced my gparents that they desperately want to leave their cozy seaside villa the first week of August and allow me and my closest friends to raid and pillage the place. For honesty's sake I suppose I should say the seaside villa is actually a cozy little double wide about a block and a half from the beach. But that is a technicality. Since all it would cost is gas money and groceries, I believe firmly in not looking a gift horse in the mouth. Once they give me a final ok I will make more official plans, but right now I think it would be an excellent last party for J, F, J, K and myself. Who knows what the final guest list will look like though.
F) I started senior year with a promise that I would not give anyone a reason to say I was the reason their relationship ended, and although I succeeded I still feel like I broke that promise. I wanted J to leave K and I wanted to be a part in J's life. Congratulations, that sounds like a distinct hope to be a home wrecker. I am a truly bad person. But although in these past blog free weeks I have thought about J a lot, I think I've finally had a breakthrough. I don't want to get involved in something that is not my business. I miss J like crazy but as long as he is with K and I am with J I am going to do my very damn best not to think of him as anything other than a friend. I am going to figure out a way to not flirt with him constantly. At the moment he is making that very easy. I haven't seen him since graduation. I had one 2 minute phone call with him about hanging out, but he couldn't so that is the end of that story. If 6 months from now J and I are both single, it might be a different story. But I am going to try as hard as possible to make my current relationship work. Right now that means getting off the computer and getting ready for his house. Peace out-C
Friday, May 29, 2009
Reaching
OK. So here begins Cat's adventures in blogging. Let's start with an in depth look at Cat's habit of reaching too far in the realm of boys. She is completely unable to feel satisfied with boys who are in her league. Actually I am not sure I even have a league. If I did I'm fairly certain JK is not within it. Considering we've been together for over 2 and half years, yet he finds cardboard to be much more interesting than Cat, I'd say I'm pretty far from his level.
I've just decided I'm not going to spell check this blog or reword sentences for grammatical clarity, so any readers on this great wide web will have to deal with my hastily written imperfections. I can't focus on grammar and dissect emotions at the same time. And now back to your regularly scheduled blog...
Anyway I think it says a lot about me when I can't compete with cardboard for his affections. I mean, he barely has to think about which to choose. If he truly feels for me the way he claims, shouldn't it bother him to choose MTG over me time and time again? Shouldn't I at least be a competitor who occasionally stands a shot at winning? The last time I remember "winning" was when he chose prom over regionals. But even then he lets his friends talk crap about how whipped he is and what a bitch I am for making him go to the stupid senior prom. How is that fair? I don't know what he wants from me. Half of the time, I don't even know why we are together. But when I forget about all of the bullshit, he makes me happy. I just wonder sometimes why we date each other when we make each other so unhappy. I think he needs to find a girl who understands his MTG obsession more than I do. I've tried, I really have. I learned to play, both casually and in tournaments. I'm not even that frigging bad at it. But it's just a game to me, and I don't understand how it could ever be more than that.
But if we disregard JK completely, we can better observe Cat's habit of overextending her potential in the realm of the Y chromosome. Let us take, for instance, the case of W. A boy who was clearly too clever, good-looking and talented to be with Cat. But she chased him anyway, and fell hard. He never even pretended like it would work out. He told me he would break my heart and he held his end of the bargain well. Of course, he was more feasible than Cat's current boy of choice. At least W was pretty much void of morals or a conscience. I could have had him if I would have been happy with a roll in the hay and a secret friendship. But along with my many other shortcomings, I am greedy. I wouldn't settle for "friends with benefits" so I couldn't have him. But really, I've yet to find a chink in J's armor. But this entry is already much longer and angsty than I intended, so I'll save my mess of emotions for the next time. -Peace out
I've just decided I'm not going to spell check this blog or reword sentences for grammatical clarity, so any readers on this great wide web will have to deal with my hastily written imperfections. I can't focus on grammar and dissect emotions at the same time. And now back to your regularly scheduled blog...
Anyway I think it says a lot about me when I can't compete with cardboard for his affections. I mean, he barely has to think about which to choose. If he truly feels for me the way he claims, shouldn't it bother him to choose MTG over me time and time again? Shouldn't I at least be a competitor who occasionally stands a shot at winning? The last time I remember "winning" was when he chose prom over regionals. But even then he lets his friends talk crap about how whipped he is and what a bitch I am for making him go to the stupid senior prom. How is that fair? I don't know what he wants from me. Half of the time, I don't even know why we are together. But when I forget about all of the bullshit, he makes me happy. I just wonder sometimes why we date each other when we make each other so unhappy. I think he needs to find a girl who understands his MTG obsession more than I do. I've tried, I really have. I learned to play, both casually and in tournaments. I'm not even that frigging bad at it. But it's just a game to me, and I don't understand how it could ever be more than that.
But if we disregard JK completely, we can better observe Cat's habit of overextending her potential in the realm of the Y chromosome. Let us take, for instance, the case of W. A boy who was clearly too clever, good-looking and talented to be with Cat. But she chased him anyway, and fell hard. He never even pretended like it would work out. He told me he would break my heart and he held his end of the bargain well. Of course, he was more feasible than Cat's current boy of choice. At least W was pretty much void of morals or a conscience. I could have had him if I would have been happy with a roll in the hay and a secret friendship. But along with my many other shortcomings, I am greedy. I wouldn't settle for "friends with benefits" so I couldn't have him. But really, I've yet to find a chink in J's armor. But this entry is already much longer and angsty than I intended, so I'll save my mess of emotions for the next time. -Peace out
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